Rangers of the Lost Car-park
Chapter 1
By: Stainless Steel Rat
It was a lush jungle scene, succulents reaching up and lianas reaching down from trees. There was a gap through which a limpid pool was visible, with a many threaded waterfall splashing down into it from a rocky cliff. The Rescue Rangers were hiking towards it, with Monterey Jack leading, slashing his way through the undergrowth with a paring knife, and Zipper sitting on his shoulder like a parrot. Dale was right up with him and on all fours, apparently following a scent, which meant the pith helemet he wore frequently slipped down over his ears. Gadget followed, and Chip bringing up the rear, acting as eyes behind.
As Monty chopped away an obscuring leaf, the waterfall became clearly visible, and the sign above it. ‘Mega-Mall Jungle Food Court’, ’19:36’. The digital clock changed to 19:37 as they looked on. Now the general layout was clearer, a large three story area with balconies and tables and chairs on each level. Planters on the edge of each balcony continued the tropical theme with hanging plants and palms, and the escalator railings were cladded with polished bamboo. Dozens of closed food outlets dotted the walls of the lowest level. The centrepiece was the tropical garden with the one story waterfall centrepiece. The whole place was dimly lit, as only a few of the lights on the domed glass ceiling were active.
Monty held up a paw in a ‘halt’ signal as they came out alongside the pool. “Alroight, mates, this is the place those thieving grasshopper mice musta came to.” Zipper buzzed his agreement.
Dale looked up and around. “Yup. The smell of day old junk food is strong here. But it doesn’t go any further.”
“Golly, it’s really nice here. Peaceful.” Gadget added.
Chip, his voice low, stated, “It’ll get un-peaceful quick, if they figure out we’re here and trying to take back their ‘god‘.”
Gadget looked up at the digital clock. “Well, we only have 1 hour and 23 minutes, 42 seconds, minus the time it just took me to say that… well of course I said more than ‘that’… but scratch that. If the Digi-pet doesn’t get fed by then it will expire. And that poor kid is so attached to it...”
“So the question is, where did they stash it?” Chip was prowling around the green verge, looking for clues. The fake plastic grass didn’t take foot-prints, so there was no way of telling which way they had gone. The grass went up to the waterfall, and down to where the pool ended in rocks. He looked into the churning water at the base of the falls, hoping it would give some clue… It did. The foaming water underneath didn't churn outwards as expected. He plucked a blade of plastic grass and tossed it in to the falls to confirm his hypothesis.
“Look guys! The grass disappears under the waterfall. I’m betting there’s some kind of gap behind it.”
“Probably a channel leading to the pump intake for the waterfall.” mused Gadget.
Chip tied the free end of his grappling line around his waist. “Only one way to find out…” He handed the coil to Monty, and moved into the waterfall along a ledge. After a few seconds they heard, “It’s okay, there’s a path.”
Behind the waterfall it was almost dark, but waxed match torches soon took care of that. The interior of the tunnel was two foot square, and made of brick, the 'rock' exterior having obviously being moulded out of concrete. It was half flooded with water, an overflow from the pool. Along one edge of the channel, a gantry of straws, drinking straws to be precise, had been constructed, and the brick wall beside it was decorated with inscriptions and pictographs in reds and whites and yellows and dark browns.
Dale examined them, leaning out from the path. "Wowie zowie! Real heiroglyphics, and lower-aglyphics too! Dried ketchup..." he sniffed, "French Mustard, Mayo and soy sauce!"
"Golly, it must be their entire history." said Gadget, holding up her torch to illuminate it.
"Well one wrong move Gadget-luv, and we'll be history." Monty said, pointing over the side of the narrow drinking straw gantry to the fast flowing waters below, which flowed into the unknown up ahead. "We fall in there and we'll be gonners."
“Aw c‘mon Monty, I’m just interested. I always wanted to know what they mean in those late, late shows by ‘historical sauces.’” Dale explained, but stopped leaning out.
“Enough goofing off!” Chip stated, still leading the way, checking ahead of him each step.
The tunnel opened out into a bigger chamber, almost a room. As far as their limited light sources could show, pumping gear and sealed electronics sat on a metal grid platform on the far side, and there was the suggestion of a human sized access panel behind it, though no handle or lever for it. Water filled the bottom of the room, the level being about a foot lower than the bottom of the channel they’d come through, so the foot deep water of the channel cascaded into it.
The straw gantry extended in a bridge spanning several feet of open space, and clearly designed for grasshopper mice, less than half the size of Gadget. It led to to a barely visible central vertical pipe, presumably sucking in the water from below. It had a thick bundle of control cabling running up the outside, forming a path that was slippery with condensation, but climbable.
They carefully made their way across the bridge, spread out to distribute the weight, except for Zipper. He buzzed away into the darkness at the far end of the room and after a few seconds the place was illuminated by a couple of halogen bulbs as he found a switch by the access panel. Now they could see that up in the roof, there was a hole about 6 inches square, offset diagonally from where the big pipe entered, and another drinking straw bridge leading across to it.
Chip was inspecting every inch of the bridge as he climbed across it. "Careful... There could be traps."
Dale bounced on ahead, bypassing the chipmunk in the fedora. "Aw, c'mon Chip, that sorta thing only happens in movieeeeeees!" The last section of bridge opened underneath him like a trapdoor, dropping him through.
"Dale!" yelled Chip, then bounded forward, diving after him. He caught Dale’s shoulders a fraction of a second before he plunged into the cold water, and was sucked down into the undertow around the pipe. Monty set himself and pulled on the line that was still attached to Chip, stopping their fall. Gadget and Zipper caught hold of the back end of the thread and helped haul the chipmunks back onto the bridge.
Chip gave Dale a bonk on the head, and said in an annoyed tone. "I guess they watch the same movies, lame-brain! Next time you may not be so lucky. "
A couple of seconds work from Gadget and Zipper and the trapdoor was disabled. They made their way up the spiral and across the second bridge without further incident. They entered the hole in the roof, which turned out to be a steep tunnel leading upwards. He held his torch aloft. It was covered in more symbols, some of them based on human warning signs for hazards and shocks.
"Wonder what this place is was built for... whoa!" He pointed down at where the floor turned from brick to fragments of dark tile. He got down and firked up a section to reveal hard packed sand underneath. He looked along the line of the floor. "Gadget, what do you make of this?"
Gadget got down beside him and ran her hand over the sand. "Well, considering how the sand is packed, and the consistency of the grains, I could make a sand castle, if we removed the tile…"
"That's not what I meant. This looks like it could conceal traps."
She dug down with a paw. "Hmm... there is enough depth for mouse traps." She stuck her torch in the sand and looked along the surface as Chip had done. "Yes, see those slight bumps? I bet they're triggers. Not a problem as long as you don't put pressure on them."
They chalk marked around each bump, and navigated across the mouse traps. Beyond, the tunnel opened out into a foot square chamber with a metal roof, another access hatch. On the far wall was a large pipe mouth that looked decidedly sinister. Scattered around the chamber were dozens of bits and pieces, mechanical toys and plastic models that had come with kiddie meals, all displayed as part of some primitive potlatch art collection. And in the place of honour, on top of a large plastic electrical housing sat the object they were looking for, the Digi-pet.
It was a golden plastic box about an inch and a half square, and the fox-squirrel creature on the LCD screen was making a whining noise. Chip stepped up to it, reaching out. “Looks like we got here just in time…”
Gadget squeaked, “NO!” and Chip stopped, wincing. The mouse engineer continued, “Golly, I’m sorry, but moving it might have caused certain problems.”
“What kinda problems, Gadget-luv?” Monty asked, a fraction of a second before the others.
“Well, with breathing for example, then there would be the falling from a great height and splatting into the iron gridding, if I have the angle of descent calculated correctly. You see, they placed the Digi-pet box on the manual release switch for the reservoir that feeds the waterfall. That’s what this tunnel is, the drain for the tank. Unfortunately, they pushed in the switch and it latched. Release the pressure, it will pop out and open the valve.“ She pointed at the pipe.
Chip nodded. “I see. So we need to keep pressure on it until we replace the Digi-pet with someething else that weighs the same.”
Dale piped up, “Neato! This is just like the temple scene in ‘Louisianna James and the Idol of Babylon.’”
“More or less.” Chip looked around, “Okay, we’ll gather stuff from around here. Gadget, figure out how to put it together.” He untied his line and started helping put things in a pile.
In moments they had a big bundle of things tied with string. Monty hefted it, while Dale had his arms around the Digi-pet. Chip had his paws on the switch, ready to keep the pressure on.
“Okay… on three… one, two, three!” Dale whisked the Digi-pet away as Monty slid the bundle on. Chip waited a second, then carefully pulled his paws away. He sighed with relief as the switch stayed where it was.
Dale pressed the ‘feed’ and ‘cuddle’ buttons on the device and the pet perked up momentarily. But then a battery low indicator lit up. “Uh oh… Gadget? There’s something wrong…”
Gadget gave it a quick once over. “Water must have seeped into the battery compartment when they brought it through the waterfall. I can find a replacement battery, and change it without losing power, but only once we’re back at my workshop.”
“Great, then let’s get outta here!” Chip exclaimed. “I don’t like the fact that a balanced weight is all that stands between us and watery doom…” He lead the way out of the chamber and back down the passage.
“Oh, I used a knot of my own invention to secure it. It should hold together indefinitely, with no problems…” Gadget said brightly.
There was a massed panicked expression from the rest of the Rangers as there was a creaking noise from behind them. Gadget continued. “Of course, I had to use what string I could find, and I’m not entirely sure it was the best quality.”
This statement was followed by a disconcerting snap. “Run!” Chip yelled, suiting actions to words. They headed down the tunnel at a run, hopping the marked out traps. Well everyone except Dale, who was carrying the digi-pet strapped to his back. Being in last place he pelted straight through setting off the traps behind him.
Water started flowing under their feet, and the gurgling sound from behind warned of more to come. Chip saw up ahead that the water had pushed the bridge end free of the hole, leaving a big gap between them and the central pipe. “Uhoh… Grab on guys!” He pulled out his grappling line and let out the free end to the Rangers. He popped open the bobby pin hook, sighted on the pipe, ahead and off to one side, and cast his line.
The main flow of water came down the tunnel, shooting out to pour in a waterfall onto the grid below. Fortunately Dale running into the others had pushed the Rangers out into midair, and since they were holding Chip’s line, they swung away around the main pipe. The line coiled round it like a ribbon round a maypole, depositing them safely on the spiral of cable around the pipe. Zipper flew up alongside Monty, and landed on his shoulder, buzzing a sigh of relief.
It was momentary. The grip of the grapple was none too secure and this was just enough weight to free it. They started sliding down the pipe like a helter skelter. They slid all the way down, and scooted across the lower bridge before they could overload the trapdoor. They skidded to a stop about half way across, and their combined weight caused the bridge to bow alarmingly.
Gadget said, “Don’t worry guys! I have the perfect answer to this problem.” She dropped something over the side just before the bridge came adrift. They dropped onto a just inflated raft made from a hot water bottle. It even had a Rescue Ranger logo on it.
Chip patted the raft underneath him and shook his head. “How _do_ you carry something like this around?” He asked Gadget.
“Practice!” she replied brightly, tying together the remains of a bridge section as paddles. They paddled their way across to the channel, which was still cascading water into the main chamber. “Don’t worry, the water levels will equalise, and then we can float out.” she said.
“I’d prefer not to wait that long.” Chip said, “When the waterfall outside stops, it’ll get noticed.”
“Too late, Chippah!” exclaimed Monty, pointing at the broken off end of the bridge. There stood a dozen grasshopper mice, clad in bright paper towel kirtles and split drinking straw head-dresses. They also carried a number of weighted toothpick spears and wickedly sharpened spork boomerangs.
Dale yelled, “I know what to do!” and held the digi-pet aloft. At this the grasshopper mouse started shaking their spears and yelling in infuriated voices.
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING!” yelled Chip, hauling him back down by the scruff of his Hawaiian shirt.
“Well, I thought they’d all bow down and worship it, like in ‘Idol of Babylon’.”
“Gadget, if you have a fast getaway mode on this thing, now would be the time to use it!” Chip said rapidly. Then he remembered how Monty’s dad had done it. “One that doesn’t involve sinking and half drowning that is.”
“Can do! I made some improvements.” She pulled a string, and holes opened in the underside and stopper. Water hit the super concentrated baking soda in the cavities, and the bottle jumped into the air like a hovercraft and zipped forward over the lip of the channel, getting out of the way just as the grasshopper mice stopped waving spears and started throwing them. “I call it the hover-raft.”
They shot down the channel, which was lined with more of the tribe. Fortunately at first the hover-raft was mostly above their level, and both spear and boomerang simply stuck into the underside, or bounced off. But as they reached the entrance and the dying waterfall, the vertical thrust exhausted itself and the hover-raft flumped into the water, though still going at a rate of knots.
Zipper took off with a bugle call, and buzzed the tribesmice along the bank, distracting some of them. This was a particularly brave act as insects were their primary food source. But he evaded thrusting spear and sweeping spork with equal dexterity. Gadget launched a couple of net plungers from her crossbow, in support and Monty swept a group into the water with a well placed paddle. Chip and Dale guided the boat. Chip stated, “At the far end, hide the digi-pet and head for the Rangerwing. I’ll distract them. Swing by and pick me up.”
“But Chip…!” Dale disagreed.
“No time…” They bumped against the far end and the raft flipped forward, dropping them onto the edge of the diorama. They bounded off and onto the floor, Chip one way, the Rangers the other. He ripped a section from a discarded Burger Knight carton en passant and folded it so the yellow lettering was visible. Then he headed at full speed towards the nearest soda counter, holding the cardboard so it was just visible from behind.
A swarm of tribesmice appeared at the edge of the jungle, shouting and gesticulating. They ignored the larger group and started hurling more spears at Chip, who by this time had enough of a lead that they all fell short. They swarmed after him, but by this time Chip was at the base of the counter, and going up it as if jet propelled, with the aid of his trusty bobby pin grapnel.
Chip hauled himself over the top and saw what he’d hoped for. He jumped up and switched on the machine. A few of the tribesmice had been flung ahead on catapult driven card gliders, but only one was flung high enough to glide all the way to the counter. He jumped down, screaming a battlecry and brandishing twin spork kukris with which he started a dazzling display of blindingly fast moves which would quail the most skilled combatant.
Chip didn’t seem daunted. Maybe the pistol style drinks dispenser he was shouldering like a rocket launcher had something to do with it. Goosh! The tribesmouse was flung off the counter on a spray of vanilla milkshake, to land on the padding of a nearby seat. Chip stepped up to the edge of the counter to overlook the main body of tribesmice, spread out between the counter and diorama. The nearest were doused as Chip waved the stream back and forth, knocking down any mouse who managed to get back up.
Another glider threatened to over-fly and was quickly diverted with a spray of milky goodness. But others were rising, and some of the tribesmice had reached the base of the counter. A half dozen heroes reached the counter top, and Chip stared them down as he targetted them with the nozzle and fired. It produced a feeble little stream that reached only halfway to him before hitting the counter. Chip gave a cheesy grin and shrug, and dropped the drink dispenser. He kicked up the pair of spork kukris left by the first attacker into his paws and hoped he could keep them off him for long enough.
‘Long enough’ turned out to be about two seconds. There was a sudden blaze of light from behind him as the Rangerwing rose up from behind the counter. “C’mon, Chip-lad!” yelled Monty from the co-pilot’s position as it zoomed overhead, trailing a matchstick rope ladder. Chip dropped the kukris and grabbed on as it rose away, spears and boomerangs trailing. One boomerang clipped the rope ladder near the top, but that was the nearest anything came.
“Is everything alright?” he called as he started to climb up.
Dale was the one at the top of the ladder. “Well, we gotta get the digi-pet to Gadget’s workshop as fast as possible, but every thing else is fine… Chip, sorry about the whole ‘idol’ thing…”
Chip was feeling slightly guilty about how he’d reacted, especially as Dale was apologising. “Forget it, Dale. I might of tried it if I’d thought of it.”
Gadget pulled down her goggles and called out, “We’re heading out, and it’s kind of windy, so hold onto your hats, well at least Chip and Monty should, because they have hats… Here we go!”
They were heading straight for one of the automatic doors. Gadget pressed a button on the dashboard, and the front flashlight went red and flickered, illuminating the infrared sensor at the top. It overrode the lock, opening the door just as the Rangerwing side-slipped down, to fly through on it’s side.
The weather outside was dreadful. Towering clouds scudded across the sky, and icy winds sliced across the car park outside. The Rangerwing bucked and heeled, and it was all Chip could do to hold onto the ladder, let alone climb. Gadget brought the Rangerwing round to head towards the park, flying over a car park that was still under construction. She went lower to use the piles of sand and temporary buildings as cover, or at least that was the idea. However the winds didn’t get any less violent, just more unpredictable.
One particularly violent updraft tossed the Rangerwing up like a paper bag, then dropped it like a rock, straining a rope ladder cable that was already weakened by the boomerang strike. It parted, letting one side of the ladder drop and weakening Chip’s hold. Another errant gust finished the job, cracking the ladder like a whip and flipping him free to fall a couple of feet onto a sand pile. He tumbled down it, ending up half buried at the bottom.
“Ohmigosh! Chip!” yelled Dale. “Gadget! Monty! He’s down and we gotta get down there too!”
The sand had cushioned the fall so Chip was unharmed, apart from sand in a few places he didn’t want to talk about. He pulled himself to his feet as the Rangerwing swept round, and went to hover, or tried to. It was pitching and yawing so much, it was a wonder they weren’t seasick. He thought quickly, and picked up a half buried scrap of paper, rolling it into a megaphone.
“What’re you doing?” he yelled.
“We’re coming down to pick you up mate!” replied Monty, who didn’t need any vocal aid.
Chip shook his head and hollered. “No! You try landing in this crosswind and terrain, you’ll tumble or crash! Get back to HQ and fix the digi-pet, or the mission’s a failure. I’ll be alright, I’ll get round to the sign of the orange section car-park. You can come back for me when you’re done.”
For a moment, it looked like Gadget and Monty were going to try anyway, but a vicious eddy punctuated his last sentence, and they barely maintained control. As they ascended and switched to forward flight Monty called out.
“Alroight Chippah! We’ll hop back here like a kangaroo with a dingo on it’s tail! Zippah will stay with ya!”
Something dropped from the Rangerwing. It was Zipper, holding onto a large nut to stop from being blown away. As he got near the ground, he released it and zipped over into Chip’s arms. He gave a little fanfare.
“Thanks, Zipper.” Chip said, closing his jacket tight against the wind, and carrying the heroic fly nestled in the crook of one arm, sheltered from the worst of it. They made their way across the dunes, past monoliths of breeze blocks, heading back towards the brooding bulk of the mega-mall.
They crossed a ridge between two high piles of sand, ducking around a stuck up off cut of wood. As they did, the humming sound of an electric motor was heard. “I told them not to risk…” Chip stopped. This wasn’t the twin hum of the Rangerwing’s engines, this was a deeper, single purr, like a remote control car...
They couldn’t quite believe what they saw next. A female mouse or small rat (it was hard to tell with the only illumination being the distant exterior lights of the mall) came into view round the side of the pile. She was running and looked exhausted, and with good reason. Following her a few seconds later was a scale model APC. It’s spotlight slashed out and speared her.
A loudspeaker cried, “Atchung! Halten!” and it raced up, stopping inches away from her. A trio of hamsters, wearing forage caps and military style jackets, jumped out of the back and ran round to surround her. A fourth hamster with a peaked cap, in what had to be the drivers position, popped open an overhead hatch and stood up, covering her with some sort of spring loaded, but still effective looking scale pellet rifle. Certainly the pellet he shot over her head punched a neat hole into the sand dune behind her.
The trio quickly tackled the female, restraining her. They brought her, though not without a struggle, to the driver, who was clearly in charge.
“So you thought you could escape, and take the secret with you, fraulein? Well you thought wrong. Nothing will stop the plan of our glorious leader! You will give it to us, or face the penalty.” With that he raised the rifle to sight right between her eyes.