The Long-Anticipated, huge production fanfic event:

Disney's Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers
AND
Best Brains' Mystery Science Theatre 3000
IN
8-Bit Star's Long-awaited sequel:

MIND MEDIA 2

------This is gonna be the last rant for awhile------

Yes, finally, I have gotten around to ending my "First Season" and,
in doing so, finally writing what is perhaps the one fanfic from me almost
all my fans have been waiting for me to write for a long time: The sequel
to my most popular fanfic, Mind Media. I should be chastised for my
lateness, because I've been promising this ever since the original Mind
Media (in an only slightly-edited "Toonami Version") ran on the Acorn Cafe
Storyboard (before I got a web page). Fans of the original will be happy
to know that, despite the various ideas I had over the years, the story
will, for the most part, maintain the weird sense of humor that made the
first one so great (I even went through and re-read parts of the original
for inspiration), though mixed with a more dramatic storyline.

Note: It is not required that you read Mind Media 1 in order to
understand this story, nor do you have to have read The Darkest Corner
(The fact that Mademanna's been kidnapped previously is explained well
enough here). However there are a few in-jokes and references you won't
understand if you haven't read the original Mind Media. I'd recommend
reading the original first regardless.

------And now, let it all begin again, and hopefully for eternity!------
------(No, I don't know what the hell I just said, either)------

MIND MEDIA 2
Part One: Walking Along the Road

PROLOGUE: For Those Who Just Joined Us

It had been a depressing day for the Rescue Rangers.
Just a few days ago, they were being terrorized by Max Alpha, a
young member of a race of metallic people known as Klimakti. Using
powers that rivalled even those of older members of his race, he managed
to terrorize the Rangers, elude capture, and even kidnap Mademanna, the
young sister of Dumb Frog, a Rescue Ranger-to-be.
Max had promised to return Mademanna, alive, in three days, which
was a relief, until I, 8-Bit Star, appeared on their television screen,
and warned them that I had reason to believe we were about to confront
an old enemy.

Six months ago, the Rangers, as well as the cast of a TV show
called Mystery Science Theatre 3000, had been pulled into an alternate
reality by a malicious fanfic author, who mockingly called himself
"Fake 8-Bit Star." In this new reality, he stranded the Rangers on a
ship infested with monsters, controlled by the Fake 8-Bit's avatar,
inappropriately known as The Demon Master Mind, or DiMM for short (And
more appropriate). He tried everything, from sending his monsters to
drugged candy to even sinking the ship, but still he failed in his
mission of destroying the Rescue Rangers.

And now Fake 8-Bit Star was returning. And this did suck, because
if my predictions were right, he'd be returning in three days--on the
same day Mademanna would hopefully be returned.

It was now three days later. The Rangers, though they would rather
have been out looking for Mademanna, they had instead decided to rest and
gather their energy in preparation for today. Now they were just waiting,
trying to make the best of the situation as they sat around the sofa.
"Maybe we'll get to see those funny guys we met last time!" Dale
suggested.
"Or, perhaps in pulling us into another reality," Gadget suggested
(For they already knew Fake 8-Bit would attack that way, since that is
DiMM's limit), "He might, while he's at it, somehow end up pulling in
Mademanna, too!"
"Hey," Chip thought, "Has anyone stopped to think exactly how he's
going to get us to wherever he's gonna pull us?"
Everyone looked at each other, but Monty spoke the thing that was
on everyone's mind:
"Well, last time, he got us somewhere else by tryin' to kill us.
Maybe it'll be the same this time around?"
As if on cue, there was a knocking at the door. Chip got up and
walked towards it, only to notice a note slipped under it. Then he
sighed.
"What does it say, Chip?" Gadget asked.
"Would you believe it's a case?"

CHAPTER ONE: You Can't Beat The...

It was a fine day on board the Satellite of Love when I decided
to switch to script format!

----

[Mike, Joel, Tom Servo, and Crow walking down the hall 'o doors, to
eventually take seats in theatre]

CROW: Yep, it's time again. What did Forrester say this fanfic was
called?
JOEL: Nothing. The author didn't even give it a name.
MIKE: You know it must suck.
TOM: Oh don't be so pessimistic. You never know, perhaps it's another
"The Rush" story. [fake laughter]

[Taking seats in theatre]

> The Rangers had just recieved another case

TOM: Of Vodka!
JOEL: Of Dyslexia!
MIKE: Of the munchies!

> and were eager to fly
> off and face the unknown!

CROW: Face to face!

> Tho saddened by the kidnapping of their friend Mademanna, they
> felt they could relieve their stress the easy way!

JOEL: Take Tylenol?
MIKE: Commit suicide?
CROW: Watch TV?

> Soon, they found the scen of the crime they were ment to stop,
> and they rushed in, but were immediately captured by Rat Capone's
> thugs, who almost considered shooting them. Not even the powers of
> Frog and Pennywinkel could save them now!

MIKE: And no, I won't say why!

> But there is one superhero, one who can out-think me,

JOEL: Yea, me.

> out-act
> you,

CROW: Yea Joel, ME!

> out-dance the sun and dry up the moon!

TOM: Considering that the moon's already dry, that's not that big of
a challenge.

> He is THE WOOSH!
> And you CAN'T FEEL THE WOOSH!

JOEL: No but the author is going to feel the effect of my hand "Woosh"-
ing across his big, ugly face.
CROW: Guys, I'm getting this strange sense of Deja Vu. It's like we've
read this before.

> The Woosh ran and stopped right in front of Rat Capone and his
> gang, challenging "I dare you to shoot! I am THE WOOSH! And you
> CAN'T FEEL THE WOOSH!" With that, he beat them up and up some more,
> and threw them up a water spout!

MIKE: Down came the rain and--

> Then THE WOOSH turned around, and kissed Gadget, who said "Thanks, I
> love you." Chip became noticeably more annoyed. Dale became noticeably
> more annoyed. For variety, Monty became noticeably more annoyed.

TOM: Hey, this is like a level up in an old role-playing game!
CROW: THERE!
TOM: What?
CROW: Tom, this has happened before, this has all happened before! Even
that line you just said, it was said before, but by ME!
TOM: Yea, whatever.

> Then the Woosh ran over to the two Chipmunks. But first he ran to Monty
> and said "Why the heck are you upset?"
> "For variety."
> "Oh." Then he WOOSHED back to the 'munks and said "I bet you
> despised my unsanitary act of INDUUUULGENCE!

MIKE: [the 'munks] No, we're too busy despising *you*.

> Well, I am about to
> INDUUUUULGE even more!"
> With that, he WOOSHED over, and kissed Pennywinkel. Chip became
> noticeably more annoyed. Dale became noticeably more annoyed. Gadget
> became jealous.

CROW: Guys, If I hear even ONE level up joke...
JOEL: Chip's stats have increased! HP +5, MP +5, IQ +10, Temper +99.
MIKE: Dale has learned "Fir3!" HP up by 7, MP up by...
CROW: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

> "There!" The WOOSH said, "I'm not only kissing Gadget, but also
> original characters! Hey, I'll INDUUUULGE even more!"

TOM: [The WOOSH] I'll INDUUUULGE my drinking habits!

> The WOOSH wooshed around and kissed Foxglove! "Thanks, I love you"
> she replied. Then he WOOSHed back to the Chipmunks, saying "And now
> I'm kissing one-shots! I have just committed more unsanitary acts of
> INDUUUULGENCE! But I can do that, cuz I AM THE WOOSH! And you CAN'T
> FEEL THE WOOSH!"
> "I leave you now! If you ever need me, just shine this anywhere,
> and I will be there."
> Then he left.

CROW: Who left?
TOM: Who right?
CROW: Who're you?
TOM: Who, me?

> The Rangers all thanked him and left. But then Chip came

CROW: Out of nowhere.

> And
> informed them "Guys, Fat Cat's rubbing banks!"

MIKE: Yea, he's rubbing them the wrong way!
JOEL: Oh, how cute, he just wants to be loved!

> "We must stop this vial act!" Dale agreed

TOM: [Dale] And then we've gotta stop the Flask act!

> "Rescue away!"
> Soon they reached the bank Fat Cat was sticking up,

CROW: Make 7-Up yours!

> and demanded
> "Stop robbing this bank!"
> "Ahh, Rescue Rangers! Have you seen my new hat?" suddenly he
> threw and trapped them in a hart.

MIKE: Bob Newhart?

> "Oh no we've got to call the WOOSH!" Gadget cried, shining the
> light.

JOEL: [Gadget] Cuz ya know it's too much trouble to just lift up this
hat and walk out!

> And who should appear but THE WOOSH!
> And you CAN'T FEEL THE WOOSH!

CROW: Guys, I'm serious, we've read this before.
TOM: yea, four paragraphs ago!

> "Ahh, Fat Cat! I knew a month ago you'd be robbing this bank,
> because I am THE WOOSH and you CAN'T FEEL THE WOOSH! But before I
> stop you..."
> He entered the hat and kissed Gadget, Pennywinkel, and Foxglove.
> then he left the hat, and went to confront Fat Cat, who he put in the
> box and shipped to Abu Dhabi. The TH WOOS Efeeogotgoihrginfvjbihdaop
> ihdghjrfngbmmgtjtheeedfgghhh

MIKE: What the hell?

> Hioehfknvbsjggeeouihtnglkvjjjjj

CROW: Ummm... Bad word processor?

> BEEEEEEE-OP
> BEEEEEEE-OP
> BEEEEEEE-OP

TOM: New operating system, you say?

> BEEEEEEE-OP
> BEEEEEEE-EEP EEP!
> EEP EEP EEP!

CROW: Guys, I don't like this. This isn't a fanfic, this is something
sinister! Something evil, something cruel!
MIKE: I'm beginning to agree... Crow, weren't you saying it seemed like
we've read this before?
CROW: Well up until it went crazy on us!
TOM: Guys, GUYS!

---

They all looked up in shock, for Tom Servo was being pulled into
the theatre screen!
"Hang on, Servo!" Mike called, standing on theatre seats to try and
reach him, all the while Servo called out "Ahhhh! Mommy!!!"
It was to no avail, however, as Mike just ended up being pulled.
Crow, however, quickly grabbed his leg, but that was, well, pointless and
didn't really help matters much. Finally Joel held on to Crow. The
chain complete, I pressed fast forward so they would hurry up and be
pulled in already.
After they were, Gypsy walked into the theatre. "Hello?" she
called. After recieving nothing but silence, she thought aloud "Guess
8-Bit Star must be writing another Mind Media." Then she left the
theatre.

CHAPTER TWO: The New World

When the hat lifted itself off the ground, The Rangers looked around
to find themselves in a whole new world, and in utter confusion. "How
the heck did we wind up here?" Dale asked.
For indeed they had wound up somewhere special, somewhere new. They
were on top of a short mound. The sky was a beautiful shade of pink,
meaning either the sky is funky, it's morning, or it's afternoon. Not
far below them, they saw they were in the middle of a beautiful forest.
Dew and moisture confirmed that it must be morning in this world.
"I don't get it!" Gadget announced, "did we die and go to heaven?"
"I don't think so," Chip responded. "Not unless those people are
angels."
Everyone looked to see who "Those people" were, and their faces
brightened with recognition!
"Joel!" Frog called. "Mike!"
"Tom Servo!" Pennywinkel added.
"Crow!" Dale concluded, "How's it goin', old buddy?"
The four from the Satellite of Love turned to see who was greeting
them, and were seriously surprised and delighted. They, two, greeted
each and every Rescue Ranger (And possible Rescue Ranger-to-be) by name.
Again, the Ranger group had been size-adjusted so that they were
approximate human sizes instead of being small rodents.
"Long time! Nice to see you again! All right!" Etc. etc.
When the joy calmed down, Crow looked accusingly at his group, and
told them "I TOLD you we had read that before! You dopes, we shoulda
known it was another attempt by a certain malevolent fanfic author to
pull us into another universe!"
"Yea," Mike responded, "But so what? I mean, we're in a place
that's practically heaven? I mean, I *hope* we're stuck here! And
the Rangers..."
"We don't hope for it." Gadget said, with the weight of an awful
memory in her voice.
"Uhhh, Why?" Dale stupidly asked.
Chip, however, bonked him, and responded "Because Mademanna's been
kidnapped, you dope!"
"You needn't worry about that!" Said a voice from the bottom of
the hill. They looked, and saw a skinny boy dressed in blue, with pink
hair, but also wearing dark red shades. From the fact that he was
translucent, they could tell he was either a ghost or a hologram.
But everyone recognized him, for it was none other than my own
fictional representation! Instantly they all ran down to greet me with
lines like "8-Bit Star I'm so glad you're here!" and "Man, you're here,
this is great!"
But then Joel asked "Hey hey, why wouldn't they have to worry about
Mademanna being kidnapped? I mean, for all you know she could be in the
arms of--"
"--A softie." I answered. "Max Alpha couldn't hurt her if he
wanted to. The important thing is getting you guys back to your home
universes. Come on, we've got to follow--"
"Wait wait!" Crow called. "What's with the shades?"
Before answering, I made a shake appear out of nowhere, and took a
sip. Then I made like I was placing it back on something, and it dis-
appeared. Then I answered "These? These are Virtual Reality glasses.
Using the right program, I am able to wander around this world as if I'm
really there, and can appear to you as a hologram, as opposed to the
viewscreen thing I was using. Nifty, ne?"
Then I turned towards a forest, facing a dirt path. "In any
instance, I have a vague feeling that whatever we should be working
towards is along this path. So, if you'll follow--"
But then I went static-like, and I knew it because I kept asking
"What's happening?" though the words were broken up by the static, which
probably made it sound weird. Eventually I faded out.

Back in my lair, I removed the glasses. "Aww, Damn!" I shouted.
Firefly's voice asked behind me, "Something wrong?"
"Damn yea!" I breathed heavily, and continued "The Rescue Rangers
are trapped in another reality. I need to be there to help them out."
"Well," Firefly suggested, "They *are* the Rescue Rangers, so maybe
they don't need you--I mean, they've solved lots of cases mostly by
themselves, right?"
"No... you don't understand. There's this guy. He pretends to
be me, and he uses an avatar character named DiMM. He's tried to kill
the Rangers once this way, and they needed my help then, too."
Firefly could see that I was seriously stressed out, and why
wouldn't I be? For the last week or so, the mystical city of Neo-Pathetika
has been being horribly wrong. A magic city is not supposed to encounter
things like Power Outs and diseases and sleep disorders, yet I had all
three, once even all at once! So she answered "If that's how you feel...
hey, I have a suggestion!" She walked up, and whispered something in
my ear. Gradually my face became happier and happier.
"Good idea, Firefly! I'll get right on it!"

The Rangers and MST3K guys had, meanwhile, been trying to sort out
the confusion my sudden disappearance had caused, ultimately deciding
one thing:
"He wanted us to go down this road." Joel pointed out. "And, well,
I really guess we should."
Well, there was no argueing with THAT, soo...

CHAPTER THREE: Walking Along the Road

They began walking down the road, deciding hell, it's what I wanted
them to do. So they did it. I mean, it's my fanfic, so I must be right.
Anyways, they were walking along this road. At first, it all seemed
serene and peaceful, but as they walked on, the place seemed to get darker
and darker.
"Ya know," Crow said, "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."
"I agree," Gadget agreed.
"Oh, strike onwards, mates!" Monty cheered, "Show some courage!"
And then everyone sighed, reluctantly giving in.
But still the woods kept becoming darker and darker. Soon, it
became almost as if they could see eyes watching them, or hear some
demonic laugh.
"Just concentrate," Chip said, trying to say it to everyone but
ending up talking to himself, "It's just DiMM again, and remember, we
were scared last time, and we laughed about it afterwards..."
Now that was actually a cheery thought, mostly because it was true.
With that, everyone went "Yea!" And marched on more merrily.
"Ummm," Foxglove said, "Actually, I just realized that I wasn't
there last time."
"Just listen to us start to brag," Chip told her, "That's all the
exposition you'll need."
"Yea!" Crow said. "That Demon Master Mind was such a buffoon,
trying to attack us with monsters and the moon and all sorts of crazy
things! Hey, come to think of it, didn't Mademanna get kidnapped last
time, too?"
"Yea!" Chip exclaimed, surprised at having that particular parellel
pointed out.
"And ya know what?" Servo added, "Crow here was the first to spot
all the parellels between this time and last time. I mean, I can't
believe he recognized that Mary Sue fanfic before I did!"
"Ummm, right..." Foxglove muttered. "Wait, Mary Sue? That guy
who kissed me WAS A GIRL? Ptooie!"
"That's not exactly what 'Mary Sue' means." Mike corrected, and
he recited the definition of a "Mary Sue."
Foxglove giggled, "Oh, silly me."
Suddenly, they heard a growl coming from behind them. Whatever
courage they had gained they suddenly lost as they looked behind
themselves. Unfortunately, they saw nothing, causing them to be even
more worried.
"G-g-g-g-g-golly, it sure is dark!" Dale commented. "Foxglove,
you know any light spells?"
"Sure do. Shirak!" She called, and suddenly she had a glowing
orb of light flying after her. "Pennywinkel," she added, "This light
isn't enough for all thirteen of us. I'm assuming you know a light
spell as well?"
"Yeppers." She responded. "Flash!"
And she herself seemed to *radiate* light, though despite the
difference in visuals, the area of effect was the same, and now there
was enough light between the entire group so that no one was in the dark.
"Hey, where did you--ACK!" Frog suddenly tripped, and had to be
caught by Pennywinkel.
"Bad leg." she explained.
"You got that spell from a bad leg?"
"I wasn't answering your question!"
"Oheth."
Frog now having to crutch on Pennywinkel, the group kept on walking,
and I indulged my ego as I pointed out my ability to juggle thirteen
characters. I abruptly shutted up when I realized the number thirteen
is nothing to brag about.

For the next thirty or so minutes, they did nothing but walk (ya
know, this sounds like a twisted version of "The Hobbit" my sister used
to tell me, it went something like this: "They walked, and walked, and
walked, and walked...") but the strange noises were increasing, as were
the feelings of being watched.
Then they heard the growling again, and panic took over. "Run
for it!" Chip, Joel, and Mike yelled simultenaciously.
And they ran, and as they did so, they heard loud crashes. No one
dared look behind, fearing what they might see, and fearing that it might
slow them down long enough for whatever it was to get them.
Ran they did, but some were in better shape than others, for Dale
happened to slow down, panting. It was then that he alone got so see
what was chasing them...
...and he saw a puppy. Sitting on it's hind legs, begging for a
treat.
"Aww, how cute!" Dale thought, petting the thing. But then the
puppy growled and said "I want food, you idiot!"
"Well you aren't gonna get it by talkin' that way! In any case,
we don't have any good on us... Say, what's in these trees?"
"CAAAAANDY! The best food of all!"
Dale reached up and picked an odd, seemingly hardened leaf off a
tree. Instantly the puppy began begging like mad again. "This the
candy?" Dale asked for confirmation.
"Yeayeayea!"
So Dale broke off a piece and fed it to the pup. He gobbled it
up hungrily, then left. Dale turned to go after the group, walking so
he could examine the leaf.

CHAPTER FOUR: Leaf Candy

Fortunately, catching up did not take long at all, for soon Dale
came upon a campsite with pre-set tents. He could tell just by looking
around that everyone had arrived before him (but then, that wasn't really
that hard to figure out).
"Hey Dale!" Chip called, "What took you so long?"
"Had to feed the dog," Dale answered, sitting down next to Chip.
"I found out something. The leaves on these trees are made of CAAANDY!"
"Great!" Foxglove commented, "Then let's dig in!"
And Foxglove and Dale dug in. No one else did, however.
"Candy," Crow commented, "Another parellel. But we ain't gonna
fall for it this time!"
Meanwhile, Dale and Foxglove kept digging in, heedless of Crow's
words. Eventually they finished off the whole leaf (These are pretty
big leaves, by the way). Everyone noticed the dazed look on their faces
and the lack of emotion in their words when Dale said "Foxglove. I.
Love. You."
Of course, Gadget was broken up over this, but they managed to put
her back together.
Then Foxglove responded "I. Love. You. Too. And. You. Know.
What?"
"What?"
"We. Can. Sound. Emotionless. Without. Pausing. Between.
Words."
"Hey, I just realized you're right." Dale said, still lacking
emotion but no longer pausing between words. Then the two lovers embraced
in the most passionless, devoid-of-romance kiss you can imagine, while
my readers try to figure out exactly what the point of this part is,
and everyone scratches their head in confusion.
"I don't get it!" Gadget pointed out.
"It's simple, really," Servo observed. "It seems THIS candy devoids
us of all emotion instead of making us act like a bunch of loons."
Pennywinkel was, during all this, picking several leaves off the
trees. "That being as it is," she said, "I don't see the harm in picking
and eating it." With that she distributed it all around the camp, except
to Dale and Foxglove.
"Hey, that's not fair." Dale complained (or, I suppose he
complained. Hard to tell when you're talking about a guy who's devoid of
emotion).
But she payed no heed to him. Attention maybe, but no heed.
Finally she was down to just one last leaf, and she sat next to
Frog. "Wanna share this one?" She asked.
"Yea, sure." He felt around for it, and broke off a chunk. Then
he stared off into space.
As for Pennywinkel, she giggled and, without taking a bite, said
"Now admit you love me!"
"I can't." Frog said emotionlessly.
"Why not?"
"Well," he responded sarcastically (seeming to forget the fact that
he's supposed to be emotionless) "If I'm devoid of emotion, then how the
heck can I love you?"
"Damn, I hate logic! Ah well."
"Hey, at least I occasionally depend on you as a crutch and a
seeing-eye dog."
THAT was comforting. Hearing that, she simply crawled into the
nearest tent and decided to get some shuteye, though she felt anything
but sleepy and had probably not been awake more than three hours.

Outside, Crow emotionlessly called "Hey guys, I just noticed
something."
"Hey," Tom Servo emotionlessly confronted, "Why are you getting
to be the smart one? Let ME point something out."
"Okay."
So Tom Servo pointed out "Hey guys, Crow just noticed something."
"Oh really, what?"
Then Crow pointed out "The Road. It ends at this camp site...
Hey, where IS the road?"
They looked, sure enough, no matter where they checked, there
was a marked absense of road.
"AAAAAAAHHHHH! We're DOOMED!" Crow and Dale yelled at the same
time.
"Indeed you are!" Came a voice. They looked, and there, again,
was that puppy from earlier! Except now, it's eyes were glowing red,
his pulse racing, his muscles pounding, himself taking on a more demonic
appearance...
"Oh no!" Crow called, "It's an anime reject, we're SCREWED!"
"Damn right!" The Puppy yelled, then it ran at them, scattering
them all across the universe... err, camp ground. Then it turned, and
like all good anime rejects, shot tentacles out of his nostrils!
"Hey, that's sick!" Chip exclaimed as he gut off those tentacles
with a patented RR Nose Tentacle Slicer.
"Waaaah! You killed my Nose Tentacles! You will pay!"
And he opened his mouth and shot a fireball at Chip, who dodged
to the left, dodged to the right, and, ummm, I can't think of anything
to say next, wow.
But finally it was Gadget and Dale working as a team (AS A TEAM,
KITTY! Can you say "Team"?) who defeated the Demon Dog. With all their
might, they lifted up the grass, and pull a section of it out from under
him, causing him to fall in a plot hole and hopefully die.
As they replaced the grass, evil laughter was heard.

CHAPTER FIVE: Silver DiMM

Finally, they found a road. Turned out there was one that appeared
when they defeated the dog. No longer resting (even Pennywinkel had
gotten up) they had decided to make a break for it.
The warm-up for the story was over, and they were being swarmed
by demons of all shapes, sizes, races, religions, creeds, and egos.
But the thirteen of 'em kept running like the cast members of Scooby
Doo, never once thinking "Hey, waitaminute, there's thirteen of us and
hundreds of them, what the hell are we running for?"
Finally, Dale exclaimed "I see a cabin up ahead!"
"Great work, Pally! We better make a break for it!" Oddly enough,
Joel said that.
"Quiet and quit stealing my voice and accent!" Monty said with
Gadget's voice.
"You should be one to talk!" Said Chip with Foxglove's voice.
Dale buzzed.
"You're right, Pally!" Joel continued, "We ARE close to the
cabin!"
"Then let's run for it!" Said Mike in Dale's voice.
"We *are*!" Said Zipper with Pennywinkel's voice.
Pennywinkel wanted to say something, but after that, she suddenly
felt inclined to believe it could wait.
Finally they made it to the cabin, marched in, and closed and
locked and closed and locked and clothed and flocked and and knocked
and closed and bonked the door.
Joel, already exploring (and having his own voice back now) dug
around in a corner, and yelled "Hey guys, wanna use Weppens?"
"Don't you mean Weapons?" Gadget corrected.
"No, these are called Weppens. Quothe the ad: 'Why have a Weapon
when you can have a Weppen? Not that there's much of a difference, but
we're hoping you're too desperate (or stupid) to care'."
"Well, don't just stand there!" Crow called (Hey, birdcalls!)
"Hand us some Weppens!"
"There's only four, guys!"
"That's right!" Said Mike, "And if you are one of our lucky
winners, YOU could recieve a special Weppen! Hurry while supplies last!"
Dale found some paper and submitted everyone's name to the list.
When the contest was over in the next five seconds, Chip had a Weppen-
Sword, Gadget had a Weppen-Plunger Launcher, Tom Servo had a Weppen-
Wrench and Mike had a Weppen-Huge Ol' Sword.
"O-KAY!" Crow exclaimed, "Now let's go kick Demon Rear!"
But then there was an evil laugh, and the door exploded in an owie
of pain, and in stepped a teenage boy with spikey silver hair, silver clothing and a cape.
"Oh my God, It's--DiMM?" They wondered. The previous DiMM had
been colored mostly black, you see, not Silver.
"Yes, my friends!" the new DiMM proudly exclaimed, "I am the
new, improved, Silver DiMM!"
"Is that like the Silver Age of Comics?" Frog asked. Then he
whimpered.
"What now?" Pennywinkel asked, annoyed.
"I LEFT MY SWORD AT HOME!"
"Moron."
"Good call!" DiMM said as he raised his arms and blew the cabin
clean away, revealing that the Rangers, MST3K Guys, and two kids were
surrounded by monsters of every race, religion, creed, ego, and whatever
I said earlier.
Suddenly a monster priest walked out, and began saying "We are
gathered here today to mourn the--"
"Ahem," DiMM ahemed.
"Oh, yea. Actually, we're here to--"
"We're here to beat them silly! You, help them count their
blessings!"
Suddenly, a midget vampire came out of the crowd. "Did somebody
say Count?" he asked with an accent you'd expect from a vampire with
a Count Something name. "Fine, I will count their blessings!"
Crow seemed to particularly hate this vampire, if for no reason
other than that it was convenient for the plot.
"You're not counting anything, Count!" He threatened.
"Are you going to stop me you puny mortal?"
Suddenly Crow happened to find a Weppen pair of Boxing Gloves and
a Weppen-endorsed wrestling ring. The Vampire had his own pair of
gloves, and the two stood in opposite corners as the announcer announced
"And in this corner, Crow T. Robot! And in this corner, yet another
vampire named Count Something! On your feet, get miffed, GO!"
DING DING! And the champs were duking it out. Both ambled it out
to the center of the ring, and Crow got in the first hit, POW! Threatening
"Come and get me, Mammajamma!"
"I vill beat your blooooood out and vrink it!" He said, WHACKing
Crow.
"Don't overdo the stupid accent!" BANG!
"But then the Count..."
"Hey, no in-character narrations!"
"Oh, right."
But then the Count WHAPPed Crow really hard, and he fell.
"One... Two... Three..."
"Crow, get up!" Mike yelled.
"You can do it!" Gadget cheered.
"Give 'em one for ol' Monterey Jack!"
"Four... Five... Six..."
"Don't let us down!" Chip yelled.
"Come on! Just get up! You know you'll win, this is a fanfic,
remember?!" Dale yelled in desperation.
"Seven... Eight..."
But it was Tom Servo who delivered the kicker: "Crow, if you don't
get up and win, I will love you for the rest of your life. I'll do
even more than love you, I'll sleep with you!"
Then Crow got up, yelling "All right all right! I'll win this
stupid fight! Geez Servo you don't have to get SICK on me!"
And with that, Crow attacked The Count with a flurry of punches,
finally landing one in his kisser, and the guy went flying out of the
ring!
Crow held up his hands in glory as the announcer announced "The
Winner, and new Cham-peen, Crow T. Robot!"
"Thank you, thank you!" Crow thanked.
Then the Ring suddenly disappeared from below him, and he fell to
the ground.
"Well, that was really, really groovy," said DiMM, "But it's too
bad it won't save your lives!"
"Want some candy?" Pennywinkel suddenly offered.
"Thank you," DiMM responded, taking the offering and placing it
in his mouth. When Pennywinkel backed far enough into the group, she
whispered "I saved that from the boat. I meant to analyze it, but never
got around to it."
DiMM stood energetically, and said "And now, I only have one last
thing to say to you..."
Silence.
More Silence.
More of that annoying Silence.
Finally I kicked the Silence and it left this fanfic for good.
And DiMM, after that silence, said "These are my words: Waka Waka
Nihao, Waka Waka Woo! Waka Waka Dim Sun, Waka Scooby Doo!" And he started
dancing like, well, like an Egyptian.
His monsters mistook this as some sort of trick, and began dancing
along. Everyone who had a Weppen used this opportunity to off a large
number of them. Then they escaped from the ring of monsters and began
running. AGAIN.

CHAPTER SIX: The Deadly Wiverwicks!

And they ran, and ran. Eventually they heard chase resume behind
them, DiMM's insanity must've worn off.
But their progress was stunted when they came to a river. Gadget
stuck a stick in it to measure it's depth, and concluded "We can just
wade it."
But suddenly some of the water rose and said "I would not do that!
We are the deadly Wiverwicks, and we'll get you if you set foot in us!"
But, right off-fanfic, Frog found a Weppen-Slingshot! "Hey, maybe
we can use this to vault over the Wiverwicks! Who wants to try it?"
"It's worth a shot," thought Pennywinkel, saying "I'll try it."
So he revved her up and let her go flying. Unfortunately the
"No physically abusing women for comic effect" rule does not fly for
fanfics, and the Wiverwicks just HAPPENED to have Weppen Ping-Pong
mallets, and batted her right back. But MY HAND also had a Weppen
Ping-Pong mallet, and batted her right over their heads, and thus she
was the first to reach the other side!
But even with that, no one had any desire to use the Weppen-
Slingshot. But then Frog asked the Wiverwicks (Of which there were
only two) "What is your name?"
The first one answered "Red." The second one, "See." And both
wondered aloud "Why, what's it to you?"
And then Frog exclaimed "I'm Moses!"
"Oh heck!" The Wiverwicks parted in fear, allowing the group to
cross a dry riverbed, as Frog called "Come, my young Isrealites!"
And then he heard the demons getting closer, and it was time to
run. He made it just in the nick of time, and the Wiverwicks came
together, right now, over them, drowning those who danced like Egyptians!

And they continued running, not caring when or where. Finally,
they ran out of space to run, for they found themself face to face with
a cliff.
"Damn, I hate this cliff!" Chip exclaimed.
"Want that I should blast it?" Frog suggested.
"HELL NO!"
"Ooo-Kaaay..."
Suddenly they were surrounded by evil, demonic flowers. These
flowers looked at them evilly, and began singing:
"One two, DiMMy's coming for you, Three four, gonna hit the floor,
Five six, you're a bunch of dips, Seven eight--"
"You guys don't sing very well at all, ya know that?" Gadget
pointed out.
Then the flowers got mean. "That hurt!" they cried. "We'll
show you!"
And they began singing the worst song in existence...
"No, not 'Come Together'!" Frog cried.
Crow quickly countered:
"He's a real Nowhere Man, living in his Nowhere Land..."
The Flowers, however, began singing even louder, picking Linkin
Park's "In the End."
"No, NO!" Frog cried in agony.
But this time, Joel jumped to the rescue with "Puff the Magic
Dragon."
But the Flowers only got louder, and changed their tune to the
theme song to "Goldfinger."
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Frog was rolling on the ground now.
Mike attempted to respond, but the flowers were so loud that he
could not be heard. The world began to get blacker and blacker all
around them, like they were in the middle of some immense hole which
didn't permit any light...
"Oh my, this is so depressing," Gadget remarked. "This is almost
as bad as all those fanfics I'm in where I get endlessly beaten, bruised,
and emotionally scarred. I can't take it any more!" and, holding her
hands, palms outward, toward anything in particular, she yelled
"SHISHI HOKODAN!"
Suddenly, from the depressed Gadget, came a large amount of energy
which destroyed the flowers but then rebounded back, bounced off the
cliff wall, and blew the group clear into the sky...

CHAPTER SEVEN: Skyfall

And in keeping with current trends...
As they flew through the sky, they thought, and figured, and
besides that decided to do things. Most of which consisted of bickering.
"Flight!" Frog exclaimed, "I love flight! Quick, let's all think
happy thoughts!"
Gadget thought, "Well, at least it's bright and sunny again, that's
a plus."
"Anyone got parachutes?" Tom Servo asked.
"Oh, gee, I dunno," Chip responded, "Hey Gadget, did we by any
chance ANTICIPATE that we'd find out about an ability we didn't know you
had and that it would send us through the air?"
"Oh, golly Chip, now that you think about it, I guess I've just
been reading that comic too much!"
Frog floated over to Gadget, and whispered "Gadget, there are
'Otaku' here, it's called 'Manga'!"
"On the other hand," Gadget went on, only partially listening to
Frog, "I think I figured this might happen, so it's a distinct possibility
that I could have brought... Let me check. Nope, scratch that, I didn't."
"HEEEEEELLLLLLLP!" Crow yelled.
"Hey!" Chip decided... then thought better of it. "Nah, I
thought, and decided I'd better let Pennywinkel have this idea. She
hasn't had any ideas in awhile."
"Thanks, Chip," Pennywinkel thanked, "As it is, I was just about
about to suggest... Mike, think you can twirl that Weppen-Big ol' Sword
above your head?"
"I'll try."
Mike tried. He succeeded, and in the style reminiscent of a bad
anime joke (And, let's face it, there's been a lot of bad anime jokes
already) everyone managed to form a long line dangling down just by
grabbing eath other's legs.
"Steady now," Mike said, mostly to himself, "Now I just gotta bring
us down... Uh oh!"
"What?" Everyone below asked.
"There's a warning here, saying 'What you are doing defies the laws
of aerodynamics'!"
And, predictably, they began to fall again.
"Oh no, what do we do now?!" Tom Servo raved.
"Howsabout we stick out our thumbs and try to catch a plane?" Crow
suggested.
"You dope, that won't work!"
Dale tried it anyway, and (though at this point probably not very)
suprisingly, it worked. A plane painted and designed to look like a
penguin flew by, hovered in place (and fortunately he missed the part
about that being aerodynamically impossible--see friends, this is what
they mean by "Ignorance is bliss.") and a door opened, and the guy inside
called "Get in!"
As if provoking my readers to draw similarities between this fanfic
and an episode of Looney Tunes, Chip, the last one in, gratefully said
"Thanks, Doc!"
"Yer welcome. By the way, my name is nosnhoJ coD sselniaP."
"I see. And who's flying this thing?"
"donneR and zzaJ. And over here, in case no one gets the joke yet,
I want you to meet our tactician: redeorhcS."
"Ummm," Crow pointed out, "This may sound like a stupid question,
but what are non-demons (besides ourselves) doing in this world?"
nosnhoJ sipped a drink, thinking of how best to answer that. "Well,
it's possible that we're actually soldiers of Silver DiMM trying to reel
you in."
Everyone gasped in surprise.
"It's also possible that we were sent by our virtuous leader, ydnI,
to rescue some long-missing members of our group, like oicmeD ekiM and
rehcetolP ttaM, and happened to run into you guys instead."
Everyone calmed down.
"It's also possible, finally, that we are figment of your
imagination and you're all a bunch of deluded corks for believing we ever
existed in the first place, and we're here to give you all a bunch of
nonexistant, imaginary parachutes to slow your really real fall."
Everyone answered "Huh?"
"Oh, never mind!" he finally answered. "Look, in about ten seconds
you guys will have to parachute out the hatch. That'll take you to the
next major Quest Point! Got it, good! Put on those parachutes! Ten...
Nine... Eight... Seven... Six... Fix... err, Five... Four... Three...
Two... ONE! All right, out you go!"
And he pushed them all out the hatch, and they were falling again.
"There!" He said, "That's taken care of. Now let's go rescue
nhiB eiluJ from her busy schedule."
And the plane faded, as if it were never there...

CHAPTER EIGHT: Dinner with DiMM

Finally they managed to land safely, though not completely unharmed,
for you see, the parachutes had turned out to be made only for use in
bad weather and thus had not worked correctly at all in this dry, sunny,
perfectly clear weather.
But in any case, when the Rangers (and everyone else--let's not
forget this is a team-up here) got up after their dirt dinners, and
noticed that there was a strange, Japanese-style shrine there (Not really
heeding the groans of the audience). Carefully they walked up it's
steps, and opened the sliding doors.
Inside was a large, empty room--empty except for Silver DiMM,
sitting there in a meditative style. When the door opened, he looked up,
and with recognition said "Well, hello. I was wondering when you people
would show up. Sit down." Every time DiMM talked, he did so with a
tone of complete confidence.
As if on cue, a large table appeared right in front of DiMM,
spanning nearly the length of the room. Of course, there was enough
room for everybody to sit (With these Japanese-style tables, you sit
on the floor, not in a chair. Convenient, ne?). So everyone did as
bidden and sat. Then DiMM, being such a good host, offered "Are you
hungry?"
"Wait just a gosh-darn minute!" Crow said accusingly, "What's all
this nicey-nice stuff about? Aren't you trying to kill us?"
DiMM simply answered "This is my world. It doesn't have to make
sense."
"He's right," Chip said seriously. "You're acting pretty
suspicious. How do we know that whatever you give us to eat isn't
poisoned or something?"
DiMM simply answered "That is irrelevent."
"Fine then. Just what IS your game, anyway?"
"That is irrelevent."
"All right..."
"Hmm, it may just be me, but one of you seems to be missing. Oh,
that's right, that little clockwork girl, silly me."
"Hey!" Crow wondered, "Wasn't DiMM like a total dope last time?
And now he's got us all suspicious and stuff. Had anyone but me noticed
any of this?"
"That one you faced on the boat," DiMM answered, "Is merely my
predecessor. I and him are *not* one and the same. We may look similar,
minus the differences in colorizing, but we are not the same person at
all."
A confused silence beset the table then, but was finally broken by
Joel, who asked "So, you mean you're his friend, his brother, his clone,
his son, what?"
DiMM almost laughed. "Clone comes closest. But to fully understand
the nature of my existence, you must first understand that a Demon Master
Mind is not a person, place or proper noun. I am a concept. My
predecessor was a concept. This not only explains my continued existance
despite one premature death, but also why I'm able to be changed, revised
for the needs of my user."
"The perfect villain." Chip said silently.
As if he heard him, DiMM went on. "You both have faced many perfect
villains in your time, but unfortunately, I am not one of them. I revise
for the needs of my user, remember? Suppose my user doesn't want to use
me for evil? It is possible. Just because I am the Demon Master Mind
does not mean I have to be bad."
"Right, right," Crow shrugged, "But why the heck can't you ever
just come and slaughter us in our own homes instead of pulling us into
these other realities? I mean, isn't that a waste or something?"
"It would be, except for one thing. If I, a concept, ever entered
an actual, existing world, like yours or the Ranger's, I would therefore
stop being a concept and begin being a character, at which point I lose
my greatest strength: The ability to be revised from scratch if needed.
"And besides that, pulling you here is just part of a greater plan.
You're being here is simply a means to an end, and you are not my target."
"Whaddya mean 'Means to an end'?" Dale asked.
"That is irrelevent."
"Okay!" Mike asked, "If we're not you're target, who is?"
"That is, for now, irrelevent."
"What are we having to eat?" Frog asked.
"That is irrelevent."
"Where did you get these neat dishes?" Joel asked.
"China--Err, I mean, that is irrelevent!"
"What does 'irrelevent' mean, anyway?" Dale asked.
"It means something that has nothing to do with anything. And by
the way," DiMM waved a hand, and suddenly there was food on the table
in the form of bowls of ramen noodles. "Now, Chip, if you're still
concerned about poisoning, then why not test the water?"
Chip stared down at his food reluctantly, but knew the suggestion
was sound: If he ate it, and suffered no ill effects, then it would only
be paranoia to think he would poison the others. If, however, he fell
over dead, that would be fair enough warning to everyone else.
So he took a bite of the ramen, and the world waited.
And waited.
And waited.
And waited.
"Not bad," Chip finally answered.
"Ya know," Crow pointed out, "Why didn't you make DiMM go first?"
DiMM laughed. "Right. You think I would poison my own bowl?"
"You mean you wouldn't?"
"That is irrelevent. You better hurry up and eat, my plan is close
to fruition."
Joel, who happened to be right next to Pennywinkel, whispered "Hey,
you used to be able to figure out things regular people had no way of
knowing."
"Yes," she whispered back, "I have noticed that the Final Origin
timeline sort-of downplayed my whole 'Multidimensional Thought' character
trait. Oh, and no, I haven't been able to figure anything out if that's
what you were going to ask. He's being too vague, and too nonsensical.
I can tell he wants us alive, but that's about it."
Then suddenly, *Pennywinkel* had a question.
"Hey, DiMM! How, exactly, was 8-Bit Star able to predict that you'd
be coming around again?"
DiMM looked at her as if somehow glad that question had been asked.
"Ah, so he figured it out. Of course, in a way, I new he would. But to
answer your question, my current user has been miffing him for past weeks.
You have no doubt heard about how he's been getting sick, his computers
exploding, and how his beloved City suffered imperfections and has
actually had power outages. It was only inevitable that someone would
pull me into the fray."
"So!" Chip accused, "You, or whoever is behind you, is responsible
for everything he's been going through!"
"Oh, there's more. It was more than amusing watching Max Alpha
play with all of you, though I'll admit his kidnapping of Mademanna was
unplanned and out-of-line, for I was hoping to see all the same people
who had been with my predecessor. But bygones are bygones, and if I
remember the first DiMM correctly, then Max's action could possibly be
considered a favor."
Pennywinkel tapped her eating utensil in thought. "So," she said,
mostly to herself but loud enough for all to hear, "Your benefactor is
also behind Max Alpha, you've been tormenting 8-Bit Star, and... what
exactly does this all lead up to? I can't make sense of it."
"My dear, the answers to your quarries..."
"Yes?"
Silence.
More silence.
Hey, it's that damned silence again!
Well, I just expired my silence license, so there!
"...The answers," DiMM concluded, "are... irrelevent. Now, if I
may be excused, I have to go stand in wait outside this temple."
He didn't exactly wait to be excused before deciding to do just
that anyway. Within moments Pennywinkel, saying "I'm done!" ran out
after him. The two met at the bottom of the stairs.
"Hey, DiMM! There is something I've been wanting to ask, but that
only you might know the answer to."
"Ask away."
"Max Alpha said there was a flaw in my multidimensional thinking.
If you know, what is that flaw?"
DiMM laughed, but seemed to consider his answer for a moment.
"There are many flaws," he finally answered, "But the one I think Max
would have thought about would be how it's use presumes that the situation
is logical or that the person you use it on thinks logically. All human
thought is predetermined on logical basics, so even for you the idea of
someone who has no concept of logic is alien... unless, of course, you've
ever met the real 8-Bit Star!" He laughed as if that were somehow funny,
and Pennywinkel got an uncomfortable feeling from the way he narrowed out
"the REAL 8-Bit Star."
"And the other flaws?" She asked, "You said there were others."
"Yes, actually. You know how your special thought pattern has been
being downplayed? Well, that's because the problems you people get into
have become less and less logical. Besides that, you are no longer 8-Bit
Star's favorite character. Sort of a Dr. Tofu or Yamcha of his fanfics,
actually. A shame, too. You made a perfect avatar."
Not to say Pennywinkel wasn't enjoying the ego stroking, but she
finally had to ask "The whole point of this wasn't so you could pay lip
service to some fanfic author, was it?"
"No. I assure you I have actual plans and motives. In fact, they
should be coming together soon."

CHAPTER NINE: Plans Coming Together, the Arrival

DiMM, now, took to walking about in the area around his shrine.
"Stay with me awhile longer." he offered Pennywinkel. "And while you're
at it, you can use your mind. See if you can't figure out what all this
is about!"
She followed up on the offer of walking around, but to the
suggestion said "I dunno. This situation isn't logical, and didn't you
say that was one of my limits?"
"Right now it is, but limits are meant to be overcome."
"I dunno..."
"Quitter," DiMM thought. But then he went on: "I once knew a man
who percieved all these limits within a part of himself, limits he thought
were insurmountable due to external reasons. But, someone else pointed
out to him 'Hey, wait a minute, you've already reached and exceeded all
those limits you percieved!' he looked, and found that it was true, that
his limits were unconsciously self-imposed."
Pennywinkel gave this some thought. "So, what limits did he see?"
"I can't tell you that, for that would be telling you who I'm
talking about, and *that* would tell you what my objective is and who
I'm working for."
"Wait!" Pennywinkel suddenly let out. "I've got it! I've figured
it out! You're--"
But before her thought could be tested, a voice from behind them
said "Yea yea, you figured something out, you can tell us later."
The two turned, and standing right there was Me. But I wasn't a
hologram, or an image on the viewscreen.
I was flesh and blood.

MIND MEDIA 2
The end of part one